I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
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