dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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