when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
