I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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