Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
