Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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