11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
