I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
