Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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