My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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