Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
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