Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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