somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
