her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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