Whod you bang
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
