I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
