i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
