we're blogging at a bar
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
