Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
