That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
