Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
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