butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
