dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
