If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
