This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
The feeling are messing with the penis
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
