I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
