i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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