Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
