look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
