I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
