Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
