garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
