remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
