We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
