Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Houston, we have a blender
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
