she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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