Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
