Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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