i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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