I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
