That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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