Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
