Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
