after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
