Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
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