it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
why is half of my head shaved?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
