We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
