if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
