Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
