THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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